it's too hot outside to masturbate.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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