Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
