So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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