it's like iHOP with fire
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
