I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
