I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
