does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
