now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
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