I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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