I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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