...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
