Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Randomize
