Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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