don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
