He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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