are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
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