Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize