My brain says no but my pants say off.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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