i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
The best revenge is premature balding
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Everclear isn't food dammit
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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