Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
