And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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