I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
