I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
