I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Are we still banned from the library?
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
