But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
