8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
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You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
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Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
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