She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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