is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
