idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
im holly from the hills drunk
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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