Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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