Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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