My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
