I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
