He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize
