Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
i believe in u and ur pee
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize
