I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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