Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
P.S. I can't hear my feet
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
two words: eviction party
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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