Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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