im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
