3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I love you. Go after that dick
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
