I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize