thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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