you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
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