Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
is wine microwaveable?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
