tell your sister to shave her snatch
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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