so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
My pussy is not your playground.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize