i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
