highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
