there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
