Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
