Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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