I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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